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Jason Freidberg & Aaron SeltzerFollow

#1 Aug 28 2010 at 5:28 PM Rating: Good
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1,778 posts
WARNING: NUCLEAR LEVELS OF RAGE IN THIS ORIGINAL POST

With regards to your latest "offering" of a "film" to cinema: Vampires Suck.

@#%^ you.
@#%^ you hard.
Yeah, **** you.
How the hell are these two sons o' ******* still making money from these retarded films, actually they're not even films, it's more a mish-mash of scenes from films made 9000 times worse and scattershotted onto a movie reel.
What pisses me off even more about this particular movie is there is a MUCH better film that years of time and effort was put into making that has JUST come out: Scott Pilgrim vs The World and Vampires Suck has done better than it in box office takings!!
This is stupid, this is another indication that standards in comedy are falling to nautical levels of crap and is a prime example of idiocracy prevailing over artwork and effort.

These two jackasses have made some of the worst films in recent years
Epic Movie
Meet the Spartans
Date Movie
Disaster Movie
Every single one of these movies is a total trainwreck, know that old saying "Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on me"? After FOUR TRAINWRECKS OF FILMS people should know better.

A message to people who were considering seeing this film.
Do not see this film, it is made by two guys who clearly DO NOT GIVE A FLYING @#%^ about making a good or even passable movie - they are in this for the money and prey upon people who do not know any better, nothing else. If you want to see this because you hate Twilight (which unless you didn't already figure is what this film parodies) then don't, you're playing right into these bastards hands. They knew a lot of people do not like the Twilight series and even more fanatically follow anything resembling it so they have made a trap of a film that is nothing more than a shameless money-maker on what's popular or not-so popular in some eyes. This is a film so bad that rumors are circulating that several cast members have taken legal action to have their names taken out of the credits - i am not joking and frankly i am not surprised.

Regards,
An average and pissed off movie-goer.

Incase you're wondering, i'm pissed off because i just got dragged to this @#%^ing piece of sh*t by my other half when i wanted to take her to see Scott Pilgrim. Granted i saw it two days ago with some work buddies and i thought she'd like it. Of course she likes the Twilight books and wanted to see this despite having some reservations about the title. I tried to warn her over and over but she settled on this, she's still trying to apologise for making us both see this.


Edited, Aug 28th 2010 7:31pm by Tatham

Edited, Aug 28th 2010 7:55pm by Tatham
#2 Aug 28 2010 at 9:14 PM Rating: Excellent
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1,877 posts
If people cannot tell that the movie is a piece of garbage just from the trailers alone then I dunno what to say. It is obvious the humor is... weak... and the jokes are meant for people that have an IQ value that approaches the interstate speed limit. Oh well, not much a person can do to stop the masses from seeing a movie such as that.
#3 Aug 29 2010 at 7:29 AM Rating: Excellent
Quote:
These two jackasses have made some of the worst films in recent years
Epic Movie
Meet the Spartans
Date Movie
Disaster Movie
Every single one of these movies is a total trainwreck, know that old saying "Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on me"? After FOUR TRAINWRECKS OF FILMS people should know better.


I believe you mean "fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — You can't get fooled again."
#4 Aug 29 2010 at 8:11 AM Rating: Decent
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1,778 posts
Ah my bad.
#5 Aug 29 2010 at 9:55 AM Rating: Good
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5,684 posts
Tatham wrote:
they are in this for the money
Welcome to Hollywood.
#6 Aug 30 2010 at 12:03 AM Rating: Good
*****
15,952 posts
Rate up for hilarious OP rant.

Chill buddy, you'll pop a vein.

Also, you now have a perfect excuse to ask for "reparations".
#7 Aug 30 2010 at 9:01 AM Rating: Good
*****
12,049 posts
I approve of this OP, completely. Years ago I saw "A Date Movie." It was, without a doubt, the worst movie I've ever seen. The ONLY reason I stayed was because I paid $14 to go there (***** NYC and its prices). I did not find a single part of it funny. I couldn't believe it could be so dumb. I actually thought the trailer for Vampires Suck had some humor in it, but no way am I getting suckered into it. Never again.

Also, Scott Pilgrim rocks.
#8 Aug 30 2010 at 9:48 AM Rating: Good
A couple of the "Scary Movie" movies were ok. But yeah, by and large, those movies are a bane on Hollywood.

"Date Movie" was horrible. I was ashamed of Willow for participating.
#9 Aug 30 2010 at 11:44 AM Rating: Good
*****
12,049 posts
Belkira the Tulip wrote:

"Date Movie" was horrible. I was ashamed of Willow for participating.


This.

This.

Holy crap, this.

Edit: On a different note, I finally saw American Pie two a couple of weeks ago, and I really enjoyed it, in a "throw back to my immature youthful days" kind of way. I had only seen the original before, probably almost a decade ago, but I saw it and the second on sale as a bundle for $5 as Walmart and thought "Why not?" It was worth it. I also realized that I probably had 80% of that soundtrack downloaded from my high school days - and I still liked most of it. Awesome.

Edited, Aug 30th 2010 1:51pm by LockeColeMA
#10 Sep 12 2010 at 8:24 PM Rating: Default
It sounds a little bit hard for me to read this, but I find it interesting.
#11 Sep 12 2010 at 11:07 PM Rating: Good
Quote:
It sounds a little bit hard for me to read this


WTF?
____________________________
"The Rich are there to take all of the money & pay none of the taxes, the middle class is there to do all the work and pay all the taxes, and the poor are there to scare the crap out of the middle class." -George Carlin


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