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Omnibus Politics Thread: Campaign 2016 EditionFollow

#1452 Sep 09 2016 at 7:10 PM Rating: Excellent
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Friar Bijou wrote:
"SCIENTISTS REVEAL: Your "picky" friend was right all along!! Bell peppers should never be on a pizza (or with any other food) as there are genetically identical to Satan's nutsack!
Well, that disproves the theory that when you lose one sense your other senses get better to compensate.
#1453 Sep 09 2016 at 9:02 PM Rating: Excellent
GBATE!! Never saw it coming
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The One and Only Poldaran wrote:
Friar Bijou wrote:
"SCIENTISTS REVEAL: Your "picky" friend was right all along!! Bell peppers should never be on a pizza (or with any other food) as there are genetically identical to Satan's nutsack!
Well, that disproves the theory that when you lose one sense your other senses get better to compensate.
I can't hear you over the scent of how wrong you are.Smiley: mad
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Jophiel wrote:
Last week, I saw a guy with an eyepatch and a gold monocle and pointed him out to Flea as one of the most awesome things I've seen, ever. If I had an eyepatch and a gold monocle, I'd always dress up as Mr. Peanut but with a hook hand and a parrot.
#1454 Sep 09 2016 at 9:03 PM Rating: Excellent
GBATE!! Never saw it coming
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The One and Only Poldaran wrote:
Friar Bijou wrote:
"SCIENTISTS REVEAL: Your "picky" friend was right all along!! Bell peppers should never be on a pizza (or with any other food) as there are genetically identical to Satan's nutsack!
Well, that disproves the theory that when you lose one sense your other senses get better to compensate.
I can't hear you over the scent of how wrong you are.Smiley: mad
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Jophiel wrote:
Last week, I saw a guy with an eyepatch and a gold monocle and pointed him out to Flea as one of the most awesome things I've seen, ever. If I had an eyepatch and a gold monocle, I'd always dress up as Mr. Peanut but with a hook hand and a parrot.
#1455 Sep 09 2016 at 9:18 PM Rating: Excellent
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Melissa McCarthy Gone at 45 - We Remember

That has nothing to do with politics but it feels like every third clickbait link is implying that Melissa McCarthy is dead or something.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#1456 Sep 09 2016 at 10:30 PM Rating: Decent
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Jophiel wrote:
Melissa McCarthy Gone at 45 - We Remember

That has nothing to do with politics but it feels like every third clickbait link is implying that Melissa McCarthy is dead or something.

And every time it's not true I cry a little in disappointment.
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publiusvarus wrote:
we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
#1457 Sep 09 2016 at 10:41 PM Rating: Excellent
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MCARYTHISM IS ALIVE AND WELL IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA OPEN PARENTHESIS COMMONLY ABBREVIATED TO THE USA CLOSE PARENTHESIS BUT MELISSA MCARTHY IS QUITE DEAD I ASKED ELVIS AND HE SAID NEW PARAGRAPH OPEN QUOTATION MARKS LISTEN YOUNG SONNY JIM THAT LADY IS DEAD AS CAN BE AND THERE IS NO USE YOU SNIVELLING OVER IT THE MASONS GOT TO HER JUST THE WAY THEY GOT TO MICHAEL JACKSON MY BELOVED SON IN LAW FULL STOP HERE LISTEN HERE COME WITH ME TO MARS WITH THE MARTIANS WHERE WE CAN STRIKE BACK AGAINST THEIR MACK IN NATIONS WHAT DO YOU SAY QUESTION MARK CLOSE QUOTATION MARKS NEW PARAGRAPH I TOLD HIM TO GO AND **** HIMSELF AND TROD ALL OVER HIS BLUE SUEDE SHOWS AND THREW THEM CLEAN THROUGH THE DRYWALL BECAUSE HIS MUSIC WAS POOR IN QUALITY I TOLD HIM STRAIGHT I TOLD HIM CLEAR ELVIS YOU ARE A PIECE OF **** I SAID I SAID I SAID LOOK OKAY ONE THING THOUGH CAN I HAVE ONE OF THEIR RAY GUNS AND I TOOK IT FROM HIM BEFORE HE COULD STOP ME AND I KILLED AND KILLED AND KILLED AND THAT WAS THE TRUE CAUSE OF THE DECLINE IN QUALITY OF PRINT JOURNALISM IF YOU FOLLOW ME INTO THE JAWS OF **** WELL THAT'S WHERE I MET MY WIFE THE HOW DO YOU SAY M R S KAVEK I SAID TO HER SUCK A BUS I WOULD RATHER NOT HA HA HA AND SHE FLAYED ME ALIVE FOR THREE YEARS IT WAS MUCH LIKE MY OTHER RELATIONSHIPS IN THAT REGARD IN PARTICULAR MY RELATIONSHIP WITH THE MOTHER OF TIMELORD IF YOU CATCH MY MEANING NOT TO SPEAK TOO EUPHEMISTICALLY BUT SHE WAS QUITE THE ***** OF BABYLON IF YOU CATCH MY DRIFT AND STILL IS HO HO HO ANYWAY I HAVE BEEN PROGRESSING WELL IN MY SWAHILI THANK YOU FOR ASKING AND I HOPE TO SPEAK WITH YOU SOON IN JUST THAT TONGUE OR LANGUAGE BUT FRANKLY CONCERNS HAVE BEEN RAISED THAT I AM APPROPRIATING THE CULTURE OF OTHERS I SAID LOOK YOU CALL IT CULUTRAL APPROPRIATION I CALL IT CULTURAL APPROBATION THE POLICE WOMAN LOOKED ME IN THE EYE AND SAID LOOK I AM ALL FOR WORD PLAY SIR BUT THIS IS A SERIOUS ISSUE AND YOU ARE NOW ON PROBATION I SAID OKAY BUT LOOK DO YOU WANT TO GET SOME COFFEE IN MANDARIN CHINESE COFFEE IS KA-FEI AND THE CHARACTER FOR FEI IS USED WITH A SLIGHT ALTERATION AS THE CHARACTER FOR AFRICA WHICH IS CALLED FEIZHOU BUT GIVEN THAT THE LADY HAD TAKEN AGAINST MY LAST PIECE OF PUNNING SO STRONGLY I DECIDED WELL YOU KNOW YOU PICK YOUR BATTLES OR HAVE MEXICANS DO IT FOR YOU FOR DOLLARS AN HOUR SO WELL I DID NOT TELL HER THIS SHE WAS SPARED AS YOU ARE NOT SHE IS AN ANGEL AND SHE WILL BE RAPTURED LONG BEFORE THE LOCUSTS EAT THE EYES OF THE REST OF US FROM OUR SCREAMING SKULLS I ENGAGED IN SEXUAL CONGRESS WITH HER FOR TWELVE HOURS IN A SKIP BEHIND THE COFFEE SHOP AND IMPREGNATED A SACK OF WASTE BEANS MY CHILD SPRANG FROM IT ON THE THIRD DAY AND ATE THE WHIMSY OF JOPHIEL BEFORE HE DIED I LOVED HIM AS A SON BUT HIS TIME WAS BRIEF IN ANY CASE IN CONCLUSION I WISH TO SAY THAT I HAVE BEEN SHOUTING INTO THIS PHONE FOR FIVE MINUTES NOW AND WHO IS TO SAY THAT WHAT I HAVE SAID IS NOT RELEVANT TO THE TOPIC AT HAND I WILL FIND THESE PEOPLE AND I WILL PAINT THEM A DISTRESSING SHADE OF ORANGE THEY WILL WAIL THEY WILL WEEP THEY WILL GNASH THEIR TEETH BUT I WILL DO IT AND A PLAGUE UPON THEM FOR ALL I CARE I BID YOU ALL GOOD DAY FULL STOP
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Timelordwho wrote:
I'm not quite sure that scheming is an emotion.
#1458 Sep 09 2016 at 11:16 PM Rating: Excellent
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Yeah, those are words all right.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#1459 Sep 09 2016 at 11:56 PM Rating: Good
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Gbaji hacked my account.
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Timelordwho wrote:
I'm not quite sure that scheming is an emotion.
#1460 Sep 10 2016 at 2:17 AM Rating: Excellent
GBATE!! Never saw it coming
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Kavekkk wrote:
Gbaji hacked my account.
That CAPSLOCK CRUISE CONTROL looks more like rj hacked it.


Edited, Sep 10th 2016 2:19am by Bijou
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Jophiel wrote:
Last week, I saw a guy with an eyepatch and a gold monocle and pointed him out to Flea as one of the most awesome things I've seen, ever. If I had an eyepatch and a gold monocle, I'd always dress up as Mr. Peanut but with a hook hand and a parrot.
#1461 Sep 10 2016 at 3:28 AM Rating: Good
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Friar Bijou wrote:
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Noice.

In election news, Hillary calls millions of Americans "deplorables", memes likely incoming.

Edit: Yep, the memes have started.


Edited, Sep 10th 2016 3:55am by Poldaran
#1462 Sep 10 2016 at 5:50 AM Rating: Good
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"Unfortunately, there are people like that."

No worries, I'm sure Clinton has a solution for this problem - though I daresay the details have yet to be finalised.
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Timelordwho wrote:
I'm not quite sure that scheming is an emotion.
#1463 Sep 10 2016 at 8:57 AM Rating: Good
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Kavekkk wrote:
"Unfortunately, there are people like that."

No worries, I'm sure Clinton has a solution for this problem - though I daresay the details have yet to be finalised.

A final solution. /nod

Too soon?
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Jophiel wrote:
I managed to be both retarded and entertaining.

#1464 Sep 10 2016 at 10:39 AM Rating: Excellent
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Too obvious
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#1465 Sep 11 2016 at 8:17 AM Rating: Good
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Just like your outfit, darling.
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Timelordwho wrote:
I'm not quite sure that scheming is an emotion.
#1466 Sep 12 2016 at 7:23 AM Rating: Good
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Debalic wrote:
And every time it's not true I cry a little in disappointment.
I knew it was a hoax immediately, but a small part of me was disappointed that Jaden Smith didn't kick off.
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George Carlin wrote:
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
#1467 Sep 16 2016 at 1:53 PM Rating: Good
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August 2014 NEVER ENDS. https://archive.is/20160915210707/http://www.salon.com/2016/09/15/gamergater/

Edit: Goofy ass archive link borked the link code.

Edited, Sep 16th 2016 2:00pm by Poldaran
#1468 Sep 16 2016 at 2:01 PM Rating: Good
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It's been a decade and you still can't link properly.

POLDARAN I am mildly disappointed in you.
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Timelordwho wrote:
I'm not quite sure that scheming is an emotion.
#1469 Sep 16 2016 at 2:04 PM Rating: Good
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The goofy *** link doesn't play well with the forum and I'm not going to run it through a URL shortener. Copy/paste the whole thing.
#1470 Sep 16 2016 at 3:02 PM Rating: Good
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That would require more effort than I'm willing to exert.
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An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come. Victor Hugo

#1471 Sep 22 2016 at 9:58 AM Rating: Excellent
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Kathy Miller, campaign chairwoman for Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump in Ohio’s Mahoning County wrote:
I don’t think there was any racism until Obama got elected. We never had problems like this. Now, with the people with the guns, and shooting up neighborhoods, and not being responsible citizens, that’s a big change, and I think that’s the philosophy that Obama has perpetuated on America.

[...]

If you’re black and you haven’t been successful in the last 50 years, it’s your own fault. You’ve had every opportunity, it was given to you. You’ve had the same schools everybody else went to. You had benefits to go to college that white kids didn’t have. You had all the advantages and didn’t take advantage of it. It’s not our fault, certainly.

[...]

Growing up as a kid (in the 1960s), there was no racism, believe me. We were just all kids going to school.

[...]

I never experienced it (segregation and the civil rights movement). I never saw that as anything.


Edited, Sep 22nd 2016 12:00pm by lolgaxe
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George Carlin wrote:
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
#1472 Sep 22 2016 at 10:03 AM Rating: Excellent
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Gbaji and Ms. Miller probably belong to the same bowling league.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#1473 Sep 22 2016 at 10:08 AM Rating: Good
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I always knew racism was Obama's fault.
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Timelordwho wrote:
I'm not quite sure that scheming is an emotion.
#1474 Sep 22 2016 at 1:27 PM Rating: Good
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Annnd she resigned.
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Timelordwho wrote:
I'm not quite sure that scheming is an emotion.
#1475 Sep 22 2016 at 1:40 PM Rating: Good
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I was hoping for a few days of spin.
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George Carlin wrote:
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
#1476 Sep 23 2016 at 9:26 AM Rating: Excellent
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Get one of those chairs that can turn. They're a great way to spend several days spinning.
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That monster in the mirror, he just might be you. -Grover
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