Terrible things people call their childrenFollow

Would they? I think of Tyrone as an Irish name.

Xavier is the only one with a nickname that we use at home in the family or close friends

I'm a big proponent of transition warnings, consistency, and consequences that everyone knows. I refuse to screech and whine to my kids. I'm a grown up. The kids grew up knowing that when I said they have five minutes before we move on, we have five minutes. Then one. Then it's time to go. And i've picked them up screeching when they were younger and moved on. Now I just say time to go and aside from a touch of whining, they pack up and we're off. They do this because of consistency.

Consistency is total key. If you sometimes stay firm and sometimes give in the kids know that they have a 50/50 chance of you giving in if they kick it up a notch. Guess what they'll do? So I'm always consistent.

Consequences in our household are not always bad. They are consequences to decisions, both good and bad. I'm trying to teach the boys that their choices have consequences, therefore they choose what happens. If they get their homework done on time, the consequence is the privilege of playing on the Xbox. If they take too long on their homework, they lose that privilege. If they throw a misuse a toy they lose the privilege of using that toy for the day. If they do something extra, like a chore, or help their brother with something, they earn something as a way of saying thank you. It could be a small token of cash for their money jar, or an extra half hour before bed. But it's their choice on how they decide to behave.

I recently had some old high school friends move down here with their child who is the same age as Soren, and I'm going to use them as an extreme example for lack of consistency and consequences. Neither parent was working together when it came to parenting. One wanted to be consistent, the other thought the boy could do no wrong. At almost 5 yrs, he was still not potty trained. I worked with the SAHD offering my ways, and within 2 months we had him fully potty trained. But the mom decided she didn't like her child having ANY negative consequences. Within a few weeks he was back to crapping his pants. This time not because he didn't know better, but because it was his form of control. We knew he could do it. He knew he could do it. He also knew he could get away with it because mom wouldn't do anything about it but change his pants and give him hugs.

He also hit, kicked, spit, and whipped toys out of kids hands. We got it slowed down until mom stepped in and said no time outs or negative consequences at any time. Her thought process was that he was just a little boy being a boy and he shouldn't be "punished" for being a little boy. By the end of 7 months, none of my friends would allow their kids over when he was over, and I was ready to pick up the phone and say the same thing.

PhD that doesn't know how to quote, and also says...



Also, Gbaji, please stop saying "end out", I know we have had this conversation before, but you really don't need MORE things that you do pointing at your idiocy.

BOOM!

Do you not understand what he means when he says "end out" versus "end up".

Is it incorrect English or something?

I didn't miss anything. Your previous post specifically referred to the cultural differentiation. See, Mr. PhD, the reason why the punishment varies among cultures is because people do what "definitely works" for them. Else, you're implying that entire cultures choose to implement sub-par techniques with obvious flaws. What you view as "sub par" is not equally viewed across cultures. My apologies for your failure to connect those dots. In any case, if taking 10 seconds to Google the said affirmation is too much work for you, then I truly question your research ability, Mr. PhD.

The linked article said nothing about efficacy, only harm reduction.

I didn't miss anything.

Hi, fuckstick. We've completed the conversation. Which part of that was confusing to you? Please address any additional posts you'd like to waste to people other than me, I will not be replying to any of the content of your additional posts. I realize you lack the self awareness to admit being wrong, but I also lack the interest in continuing such a discussion. The good news is that you're so obviously catastrophically wrong, that pretty much anyone else can pick up the thread if they're so inclined. Good luck.

I think that's unfair. If you're of the prescriptive disposition and you think his mistake's laughable, you ought to have picked up on the mistakes of the other users in the thread first, given that some of them are much worse.

I'm saying it wasn't a mistake. You, on the other hand, did.

Granted, you did very loosely begin to explain what people of descriptive dispositions would say in his defence, but you and a few others don't fit in that camp.

Edited, Jun 12th 2014 3:33pm by Demoncard

Well sure, someone has to do the work while you're off giving talks, getting awards, and having buildings named after you.

This thread is going places

You said that his use of the verb phrase "end out" was a mistake. You didn't use the word "mistake", but the language you used had that effect.

Nope. See if you can riddle out why "incorrect" and "mistake" are distinct words with differing usage cases.

I'll wait.